NJ Parkway

Marie, Guy, and I ventured down the NJ Parkway to Joe Stef-a-poo-poo's graduation party in Brick, NJ. A normal 1 hour long drive took a whopping 3 hours. I tried to explain away the congestion to my out of towner friends..."Yikes, 4th of July traffic sucks, right?"..."Oh, uh, the traffic pattern changes must have these drivers confused!!"..."Out of towners can't drive!!...Uh...I mean...how 'bout some music?" After 2 1/2 hours of bumper to bumper boredom, the traffic vanished but what was left? A rigor-mortis-induced deer on the grass next to the left lane...HAVE THESE PEOPLE NEVER SEEN A DEAD DEER!?!?!? This is New Jersey, idiots. On my way to work I pass several dead deer and the New Jersey Commission of Dead Animal Removal isn't real quick on the pick ups. So, I kinda get close the road kill... "Mornin' Millie!"..."How's it hangin' Hank?" -- a week can go by before my dead, dear, deer friends are removed. It's not like seeing a dead deer is something special. I've seen more unique roadkill...dogs, cats...So, what's the big freakin' deal???? JUST DRIVE.