Thursday, August 18, 2005

I hate titles.

I didnt want a title. And, I might not even use punctuation today...so there. Yeah, that's right - an ENGLISH teacher not wanting to use proper punctuation. I'm tired. So sue me.

I havent written in a while. Being a lunch day can be exhausting. I didn't know how exhausting it can be. I like being a lunch lady - perhaps too much. If my parents, who are my bosses, could afford me, I'd make it my career. But, I dont know how long I'd last.

Being a lunch lady is a lot different than being a teacher. I dont have to get in front of a class of whiny kids and teach them about stuff that I love but that they hate. I dont assign homework. I dont have to grade any papers. I dont have to talk to their parents when they are failing. I dont have to yell at them to stop talking.

But then again being a lunch lady is a lot like being a teacher. I sit at a counter and have to hear adults whine about how we dont sell enough stuff for lunch --- Let me explain. I work in a cafe-a-closet (like a cafeteria only it's just an old converted store room that's on the same walk in level as the underground parking garage, need I say more?). I do not have a stove. I do not have an oven. I have a sink and a fridge. Any food that comes in is made my mother and sister at the real cafeteria next door. And yet - YET!!! We have: sandwiches (6 different kinds), a full salad bar (with stuff on it like POACHED FRIGGIN SALMON!!!), rolls, bagels, muffins, HOMEMADE soup, yogurt, chips, candy, jello, fruit, fruit salad, pudding, yogurt smoothies, ETC ETC... and these WHINY people complain that we dont have enough to eat. They say things like, "Is the pasta fagioli good?" And they say fa-jol-ee not fa-zool like someone would who KNOWS what the hell they're talking about. And I say, "Yes." And they say, "Oh, you're just saying that cause you work here." And I say, "No, I'm saying that because my mother made it and I've been eating it almost every Friday night for the last 25 years, asshole." I usually omit the asshole part, but when it said aloud, I kinda mutter it as to diffuse any further conflict. I don't assign homework here, yet I find myself doing homework for this job. I make all kinds of nifty signs for the soup of the day and the specials. I put the soup signs on the front door, on the crock pot, and on the counter and people will still ask "What's the soup today?" I don't have to talk to their parents, but I'm tempted to talk to their bosses. This one guy grabbed a fork and began TASTING STUFF OFF THE SALAD BAR!! I was like HEY BUDDY! ARE YOU RETARDED??? And tell them to stop talking? Sorta... I've got another guy who complains EVERY DAY that we charge tax. So finally I looked at him and said, "Do you pay tax when go to the grocery store? How about in a restaurant? Wouldn't the IRS be mad if YOU didn't pay YOUR taxes? Well, they hold us to the same standards." ASSHOLE. Grrr. SHUT UP!

Please don't get me wrong, I like my job, but some people are just plain stupid.

1 Comments:

Blogger Evan said...

i love you cara. make me some food.

9:58 PM  

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